


Forget me not

by IcyTouch



Series: Sky's the limit [2]
Category: Free!
Genre: A lot of what the fuck is happening, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Also this is a christmas present, Amnesia, Angst, Comfort, Confusion, Despair, Embarrassing memories, Embarrassment, Fluff, Forced Abortion, Haru is trying, I love you potato have fun, Kisumi is a doctor fight me, M/M, Minor Injuries, Nightmares, OOC-ness I'm sorry, Omega Verse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-27 03:08:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17154140
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IcyTouch/pseuds/IcyTouch
Summary: Why was his head pounding?Why were his legs aching?Why was there blood dripping down his cheek?Where was he?Why was he here?But more importantly:whowas he?Rin finds himself in the middle of Iwatobi, alone, frightened to death, out of breath, injured and unable to remember who he is. Then, there's this beautiful, blackhaired Alpha whom he doesn't remember either - but why would he forget his boyfriend?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [My potato](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=My+potato).



The sun was blazing down on the rippling surface of the sea, waves with white foam floating on them slowly splashed against the beach and rocks, people were taking walks on the seafront promenade, holding hands, enjoying cones of icecream and on this beautiful day in summer, the young man standing at the bottom of the shrine stairs forgot who he was.

Scowling slightly, he tried to catch his breath. He must've been running, the muscles in his legs were aching and so he leaned forward, resting both hands on his thighs to relieve some pressure in his lungs. While he stared at the torii shrines that led up the hill, he noticed the bruises on his right hand and furrowed his brows. Had he fallen on his way down here? Why was he here? What had he wanted to do? Touching the fresh, purple marks, he flinched at the pain.

"Ouch, that hurts like shit!", he cursed under his breath and brought his hand up, sliding his tounge over the discolored skin instinctively.

While he carefully cleaned the wounds and soothed the ache with long, gentle licks, he suddenly noticed that he couldn't remember what he was doing here at all.

_He couldn't remember._

A few people walked past him and he turned his head slightly, wondering if he was here with someone. But there was nobody. Nobody next to him, asking if everything was alright. Nobody by the first landing of the stone stairs, looking down at him worriedly, wondering why he wasn't coming. He was alone and he didn't know who he was.

A cold feeling of anxiety started to soak him right to the core. He didn't know what he was doing here. He knew that this was a place he frequently visited, that he liked to come here, that it was somewhat... _important_ to him, but he couldn't remember why exactly. He couldn't remember his name. He couldn't remember how old he was, he couldn't remember the colour of his hair, he couldn't recall if he was in a relationship, married, if he had kids, if he was living alone.

"What the hell is going on?", he whispered to himself, trying to filter any information out of his voice. "Don't freak out now, maybe it's just a short blackout. You'll be okay soon."

The shirt he was wearing stuck to his upper body and when he tugged at it, he felt hard muscles beneath his hands. Was he an athlete or something? It was unbearably hot and he looked up into the clear blue sky. Not a cloud was to be seen. Summers were growing hotter, he remembered. Climatic change. Warm winters, hot summers. Save water, shower in pairs. He felt completely exhausted. Slowly, step by step, he began walking down the street, passing small groups of people on the way.

_Who am I?_

He felt like a puppet, held by invisible strings, moving, but lifeless. The bruises on his hand were still stinging a little and he examined them again. Looked like someone had gripped him a little bit too roughly or something. Had somebody tried to kidnap him? Had he been drugged? Was that the reason why he couldn't remember anything? With every step he took, the dull ache in his head grew sharper until it felt like tiny knives were puncturing his brain.

"Don't faint now, that would be pretty inconvenient", he muttered, trying to keep his vision from blurring.

Just as he lifted one arm to wipe the sweat off his forehead, there was a slightly sticky feeling to his hair and when he stared at his wrist in surprise, he noticed a smear of red on his fair skin.

"Oh fuck no", he groaned, frantically searching for injuries somewhere on his head.

Had he lost his memory due to a hit on the head like in all those comic books? Was that even possible? Pain and exhaustion made him stumble as he brushed the bloody injury on his forehead, feeling warm liquid beneath his fingertips. And all of a sudden, he remembered. He remembered, that he'd wanted to go to Sosuke. He remembered where Sosuke lived. He remembered that Sosuke was his best friend. He remembered how long it would take him from here to get to Sosuke's flat. He remembered, which date it was. He remembered that he was coming from the northern part of Iwatobi and that he needed to head west now. He remembered that it was four o'clock in the afternoon, but he couldn't recall why there was blood dripping down his temple. And suddenly, he remembered that he was scared.

"This gotta be some sort of horribly realistic nightmare", he whimpered desperately, burying his face in both hands and closing his eyes, when-

"Oh my God, what happened?"

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

His wrists were grabbed, pulled down and then, hands came up to cup his face.

"Holy shit, did you hit your head or something? Did you get into a fight? Rin, answer me, for God's sake! Are you okay? Come, sit down!"

He was forced down onto a nearby bench and the person in front of him began to look over the injuries on his hand and head.

"Did someone attack you? Are you alone? This looks really bad... Rin, can you answer me? Rin!"

Staring at the pinkhaired man, he parted his lips slightly before frowning.

"Kisumi...?"

He didn't know why, it just occured to him that this person's name was Kisumi. A relieved gasp answered him and fingers gently brushed a few strands of his sweaty hair to the side

"Yes, yes of course, Rin! You scared the living shit out of me just now. How did you get that wound? And why are you so distraught? Did you get into trouble with someone?", he asked softly.

But instead of answering, the young man in front of him stared ahead blankly and thought about that name.

_Rin._

A white flash emitted from the back of his head and he remembered dozens of voices calling him that, he remembered turning around when being adressed with this name, he remembered faces, smiling faces, his friends calling him Rin.

"Rin", he muttered fascinatedly, more to himself than to Kisumi. "My name is Rin, isn't it?"

The pinkhaired man's eyes darkened noticeably and he brought the back of his hand up to check on Rin's temperature.

"Rin? Of course that's your name!"

Slowly tightening his grip on the young man's upper arm, Kisumi looked at him very seriously.

"Listen, you're hurt and obviously very confused. I will take you to the hospital now, if that's okay. Come on, you can lean onto me in case you start to feel dizzy."

He placed one arm around Rin's shoulders, took his hand and began to lead him down the sunny streets. With furrowed brows, the redhaired man set foot after foot, thinking. He knew that he and Kisumi had gone to the same school once, he knew that Kisumi loved to play basketball, he knew that Kisumi was working as a doctor, he knew that Kisumi was touchy and always bubbling with laughter and life and that his smile was so damn contagious that it almost seemed ridiculous. He knew who Kisumi was - so why, _why_ didn't he know who he _himself_ was?

Rin, that was his name.

So many voices had called him that already and they were all echoing from the blank walls of his mind, creating a hopeless mess inside of him, but slowly, very slowly - like ice creeping over the surface of a lake in winter - one voice began to drown out all of the others.

_"Rin..."_

The short name got dragged out slightly, a soft, pleasant touch was added to it and for the briefest of seconds, he felt like smiling. But then, he suddenly noticed something. While he could put a name or at least a face to every other voice, this one... the loudest, clearest one, obviously calling him, asking him to remember, _begging_ him to remember, remained unknown to him. He couldn't remember who it belonged to. Still desperately questioning himself about that one voice, he noticed a change in the air around them. They'd entered a cool, white room and a sharp, medical scent filled his lungs.

The hospital.

"Come on, just a few more steps, okay?", Kisumi muttered next to him, feeling Rin's weight grow heavier and heavier on his shoulder. "I need help over here!"

A few nearby paramedics rushed towards them, gently helping Rin over to one of the trauma rooms. Hands brushed his hair back, inspected the wound on his forehead, wrapped his wrist with bandages and during all of it, Kisumi kept holding his hand. Rin heard them talk, heard his friend explain where he found him, heard him whisper that he wanted to do a MRI. The paramedics disappeared to get one of the doctors on duty and Kisumi settled down next to Rin, gently stroking his cheek.

"Everything's going to be okay", he whispered with a forced smile. "Are you feeling better?"

"I... I don't know", the young man muttered under his breath, when suddenly, the door opened.

A doctor in white robes entered the small room and smiled at them. His long, pink hair was tied together into a ponytail and his eyes were the same colour as Kisumi's.

"Hello, dear, I thought you had a day off today?", he mused as he went through the notes on his clipboard. "A patient with amnesia, I've heard? Rin?"

He whipped out a small flashlight and checked Rin's eyes for a moment.

"What's your name?"

The young man blinked irritatedly. What was up with all the questions today?

"R-Rin", he answered hesitantly.

"Do you know where you live?"

Live? The dull memory of a house, a wooden front door, flashed up before him, but it faded so quickly that he couldn't do anything but shake his head. The doctor furrowed his brows, but then, he lifted the flashlight again. A small, blue flashlight. Blue fog began to whirl in front of him and he squeezed his eyes shut against the sudden bright flash of light in front of him. He wanted to see, he wanted to _remember_ and there it was. White fabric with blue stripes and markings, billowing in the wind, a hand reached out towards him.

_"Come, Rin."_

"Dad, what's wrong with him?"

Kisumi was clinging to his arm, stroking his sweaty hair.

"It seems like he's remembered something. Can you hear me?", the doctor asked politely, but Rin couldn't answer.

His lips felt dry and his tounge heavy, there was a strange, ice cold feeling seeping down his neck and chest into his stomach. 

"White", he finally managed to choke out. "There's white fabric, with blue stripes on it."

The doctor gripped his wrist lightly, checked his pulse and bit his lips worriedly before turning towards Kisumi again.

"Honey, you know Rin pretty well, don't you? Is there anything you can think of that fits this description?"

The pinkhaired Omega grew paler by the second, then he began to nod slowly.

"Dad... The swimteam of Iwatobi used to wear white and blue jackets." He suddenly sounded very weak. "His mate... Haru... still wears his one whenever possible, especially when they're on break from their training with the Olympia team like now."

"Ah, yes. Rin? Do you remember your mate?", the doctor asked while gently applying pressure to his injured wrist. "His name is Haru."

Still, the young redhaired man literally stared through him as if he was thin air while he tasted the name on his tounge.

"Haru..."

Suddenly, Kisumi gripped his arm so hard that it almost hurt, he was trembling all over.

"Rin, don't tell me... please, say that you remember Haru, please!", he cried out with shaking voice

His father hurried over, placed both hands on his shoulders and looked at his son sternly.

"You are going to agitate him _even more,_ Kisumi. I know this sounds bad at the moment, but we will figure this out somehow. If you don't mind, would you go and call Haruka? He needs to be informed if they are officially mated to eachother."

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

"Hysterical amnesia is a rare psychological reaction of the brain. If a person experiences something that they are not able to process, in some cases they will hyperventilate and as a consequence, the mind forces them to forget about the incident and everything related to it so the person won't suffer any mental harm."

Rin was sitting by the window in a white, sterile room, afraid to meet the man everyone told him was his mate. Kisumi's father had spoken to him for a long time, had asked him about everything he still remembered, had explained his condition to him.

Hysterical amnesia.

"Haruka. Haru", he muttered to himself, desperately wishing for the name to tell him about the person it belonged to, but there was nothing.

_Nothing._

Blank walls had him captured in his own mind, cutting him off from anything he could possibly remember about himself or the man that was his partner. Suddenly, there was a light knock on the door and Kisumi slipped inside, looking weary and exhausted.

"Rin, Haru is here now and he's worried sick about you. I told him to wait, I said that you're probably not ready to see him yet, but I'm not sure how long my Dad can keep him at bay."

Rin looked at him with nothing but despair in his eyes, silently begging Kisumi for help, begging for his friend to spare him from this encounter.

"Kisumi, I can't!", he whispered with shaking voice. "What... what if I will never remember him? What if he hates me?"

The pinkhaired man knelt down next to him, gently stroking his face and hair to calm him down while a soft purr emitted from his chest.

"Haru? Hating you? Oh, Rin, I know that you're scared, but you're talking nonsense right now! He loves you with his body, heart and soul to death!"

Rin's gaze wandered back to the park beneath his window. A few patients of the hospital were enjoying the warm weather outside, walking around, smoking. A few kids were playing football. And before he could even think of an answer, there were frantic steps on the hallway outside.

"Let me see him, let go of me, let _go!_ Rin, where are you? _Rin!"_

The door was slammed open, a young man, breathing heavily, barged in. And as if the world was mocking him, Rin didn't recall ever seeing this person before.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is the Christmas present for my lovely potato~ (*^o^*) I hope so so so much you'll enjoy this RinHaru-Omegaverse fic! ( ՞w ՞) Remember: ur smol bean luvs u very very much ~♡
> 
> To everyone else reading: thank you soooo much for tuning in and hopefully, y'all enjoy it too! ( ﾉ^ω^)ﾉﾟ
> 
> xoxo  
> (◕‿◕✿)


	2. Chapter 2

Haruka Nanase was tall, slender, with jet black hair and the most beautiful blue eyes Rin could imagine and even the expression of frightful concern on his face couldn't hide the fact that he was incredibly handsome.

"I came as fast as possible", Haru whispered as he stepped closer quickly, wrapped both arms around Rin and buried his face in the redhaired man's neck. "Rin, I'm so glad you're okay, Rin..."

He was trembling violently, his musky Alpha scent was tainted with bitterness and Rin almost felt bad about pushing him away, but the strange, empty feeling in his chest made him flinch back.

"Rin?"

Haru's eyes were wild like the ocean on a stormy day as he watched the young man lower his head and turn halfway to the side.

"You... don't recognize me, right?", the blackhaired Alpha muttered, his gaze wandering over Rin's obviously uneasy expression.

"I _want_ to, I really want to."

The young man was almost choking on his own words as he talked. He couldn't remember this man. He couldn't remember his mate. He couldn't remember Haruka Nanase.

How could someone forget the person they loved? How could someone forget their _partner?_

"Y-You are going to hate me", Rin whispered, not able to hide the sob in his voice. "I can't remember, I don't know you, you are going to hate me, you will-"

But before he could even finish his sentence, Haru was touching his cheeks, gently pushing their foreheads together and closing his eyes.

"Rin, I could _never_ hate you, please...", the Alpha breathed, a pained expression on his face. "Please, just let me know what happened, tell me what's wrong, we can do this, I promise..."

For a while, Rin wasn't able move away. He could smell himself on Haru, a sweet, faint scent, embedded in the clothes of the blackhaired man and in combination with the way he was being held, it calmed him down to the point where he would stop shaking.

"How long?", he finally whispered, staring at the fabric of Haru's jacket beneath his fingertips. "How long have we known eachother? How long have we been together?"

The Alpha moved slightly, readjusting their position so it was more comfortable for the two of them.

"Nine years. We met three months after your twelfth birthday. Mated on the twenty-second of September two years ago."

His answer was so simple, yet it made Rin shake to the core. How could someone possibly forget the person they'd basically been friends and lovers with throughout half of their life?

"You don't believe me?", Haru muttered, eyeing him cautiously before pulling out his phone and switching it on.

The first picture to appear on the screen was a photo of an old polaroid, showing four boys in matching swimsuits and he recognized himself, he knew that those two other boys were Nagisa and Makoto and he saw Haru, standing in the middle with his face turned to the side and a blank, almost annoyed expression.

"Coach Sasabe took the picture after our first relay together. We won", the blackhaired Alpha stated quietly as he handed Rin the phone.

Carefully wrapping his trembling fingers around it, the redhaired man stared at his younger self, the way he was grinning, one arm thrown around Haru's neck like he'd had to stop him from running away.

_I forgot myself._

The next picture showed him on a large rock above a waterfall in the midst of a giant forest, obviously taken by Haru himself.

"Canada, three years ago. We went on a holiday with everyone, you insisted on climbing up that waterfall."

Rin nodded fascinatedly before continuing to swipe through Haru's phone.

"What do I do for a living?", he asked with shaking voice.

This time, there was a long pause before Haru answered and his face mirrored all the despair Rin was feeling.

"You are an Olympic athlete, just like me. We're both in the Japanese swim team. You mostly participate in the butterfly races and the relay."

Slowly, tears began to form in Rin's eyes and he lowered his head so Haru wouldn't see. He didn't want to cry in front of his mate and make everything even worse than it already was.

"Why can't I remember?", he sobbed, frantically wiping his cheeks with the back of his hand like a child. "Why can't I remember _anything?"_

Haru and himself, standing by the railing of a black yacht at night in front of a colourful city, his red hair was swaying in the light breeze and he could almost feel the warm night air on his skin as he stared at the photo. The Alpha's arm was wrapped around his waist easily, but in a strange, possessive way, and he was smiling faintly. Tears dripped onto the phone's display now, blurring the photo.

"It's okay if you don't remember", Haru muttered softly. "It's okay if you forgot. Makoto took this on our trip to Istanbul a few months ago. You wouldn't shut up until we went out onto the sea to observe the city at night."

This almost brought a smile to Rin's lips, as if something inside of him was saying _"Yes, that's so me",_ then he looked up at the blackhaired Alpha and wiped his face again.

"Tell... tell me about myself, please", he whispered, looking back down at the picture of them.

Haru frowned, the nodded carefully, like he was hesitant to respond.

"What would you like to know?", he asked, voice slowly trickling from his lips, but Rin could only shrug and so, his mate sighed. "You... are very intelligent. Determined, too. Incredibly passionate about training and winning, but you're also a little bit of a drama queen. Strong-willed. I've never seen an Omega like you before. Sometimes, you're even more jealous than me."

Rin flinched like Haru had just insulted him.

"Is that my worst trait?"

The blackhaired Alpha suddenly closed his eyes and the corners of his lips twitched into something like a brief smile.

"You're a hopeless romanticist."

"I'm romantic?"

"Pretty much, yes. But everyone who knows you just a bit better is aware of the fact that you are not hesitant to think seriously too."

Haru was looking at him again with his deep blue eyes, like he hoped Rin had remembered something while he'd kept them close.

"What is my favourite colour? My favourite food?", the redhaired man dug further, desperate to hear more about the person he was and Haru responded without hesitating for even a second.

"Dark red. Everything made of meat, you hate fish."

"We travel alot, don't we."

It was more of a statement than a question, but his mate answered anyway.

"We have to. Olympic training takes us basically everywhere and in our spare time, we try to rest as much as possible, either here in Iwatobi or on vacation."

Rin nodded absent-mindedly, then he turned around and looked out of the window again.

"What about our relationship?", he asked quietly.

Haru seemed to struggle for words, letting his gaze wander from Rin down to the floor and back up again, then he parted his lips hesitantly.

"I am so very lucky to have you in my life. You probably don't remember this either, but I... hurt you when we were younger. I hurt you so much and it destroyed us both and after that, I knew that I loved you. I loved you during your time in Australia, I loved you when you came back and acted so cold towards me. I loved you during all of our races and competitions, I loved you during all of Olympia and I still love you to this day", he muttered, clearly uncomfortable and Rin nodded without uttering a single word while anger and frustration consumed him once more.

_Why can't I remember the man who obviously loves me more than words can say? What made me pretend all this has never existed?_

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

The whole house smelled like himself and Haru as he entered, looking around nervously, hoping something here would make him remember. Haru closed the door behind them and began to examine Rin's face closely as if to look for any evidence of recognition.

"Do you want to lay down or eat something first?", he then asked, trying to keep his voice as firm and confident as possible when he saw Rin's eyes growing dull.

He didn't remember. Nothing here was able to make him remember.

"Something... something to eat would be nice", the redhaired man agreed before slowly wandering into the living room, letting his gaze slide from left to right while Haru put his jacket away and disappeared into what Rin assumed to be the kitchen.

There weren't many personal belongings laying around here as to expect from two people who were out of town for most of the year, but he spotted some books, a mobile phone, clothes, neatly folded on one side of the couch, a red messenger bag sitting by the coffee table and a grey towel with white dots thrown lazily over the TV. A strong urge to grab it from there overwhelmed Rin and before he could think, he'd already curled his fingers into the worn-out yet still fluffy fabric, feeling a warm tingle on his skin. A delicious scent rose from the towel and he lifted it up, hesitant, but then he buried his face in the soft fabric.

_Oh God..._

White flashed inside his head, his head, his chest hurt, his lungs hurt, he couldn't breathe and before he knew it, he was on the floor, desperately gasping for air, eyes wide in panic and pain.

"Rin!"

His arms were grabbed, he was held against a warm body, felt hands stroking his sweaty face, heard-

_Hot steam fills the bathroom and he sighs with a smile, knowing that Haru is probably in the bathtub for hours now, but as he pushes past the curtain by the door, he hears the shower running._

_"Haru, I'm home!", he shouts over the gushing of water, confused by the unusal scene of his mate not soaking in the bathtub but rather taking a regular shower for once._

_But before he can leave the bathroom again to put his bag away and change into some more comfortable clothes, he's grabbed and pulled into the shower cabin, slammed up against the wall and forced into a heated kiss. Groaning, he pushes both hands against Haru's chest to get him off of himself, but it's to no use._

_"Haru, what's gotten into you? Have you gone nuts? My clothes will get wet!"_

_"Take them off then", the blackhaired Alpha breathes against his lips and Rin feels himself growing hot._

_The cold water from the shower head above him soaks his shirt and jeans and Haru doesn't wait one more second to peel them off of him, throw them out and get one hand between Rin's legs._

_"W-What are you- Ngh! Haru, y-you're going into rut, maybe-"_

_His voice dies out into a faint moan as he pushes his face into the crook of Haru's neck, claws his hair and inhales the scent of ryokucha that emits from his mate's skin, his favourite body wash._

-Haru call his name, noticed the despair of his mate and finally was able to fill his lungs with air again, sitting up, shaking and clinging to the blackhaired Alpha.

"Rin, are you okay? Do you want something to drink? Don't move too much, you'll-"

"I remembered!", Rin gasped with his eyes squeezed shut. "I just, I..."

But before he could continue, he noticed what he was about to say and blood came rushing to his cheeks, making him blush so heavily that Haru's face, which had just lit up, turned into a scowl.

"What? What's wrong? Are you okay?"

Rin couldn't answer. What the _hell_ had he just remembered? It was like... watching himself having sex with a _stranger!_ On the other side, Haru was his mate, they'd probably done this stuff a thousand times before and it was _good_ that he'd remembered something.

"Y-Yeah, I'm okay", he whispered, trying to sit up even further, but Haru pushed him down again, still stroking his hair and face calmly, lovingly.

"Your cheeks are flushed and your eyes glassy", he noted with a straight face. "You only look like this when your heat comes up."

Now, that _didn't_ exactly help with the images already running wild in Rin's head and he sat up hectically, brushing his hair back and turning away from Haru.

"I _said,_ I am _fine!",_ the young Omega blurted out, mortified, but his mate knew him too well.

"Rin, I don't know if this... amnesia... is going to mess with your heat cycle or not, but if it does and you don't feel good, tell me anytime, okay?", Haru asked, gently running one hand down Rin's back and making the young man shudder again.

What if he told Haru? Would he laugh? Or maybe even get angry? Would he suggest something? Something along the lines of _"If that's what you remember, then maybe doing it will bring back your memory"?_ Rin was trembling with fear by now. Was he really such a slut? Why would someone remember only the sex about a relationship?

"When... when does my cycle usually start?", he whispered, unsure if Haru would even know.

But his worries were unfounded. Of course Haru knew.

"Usually? Around the sixteenth of every second month. Kisumi has worked hours after hours to get you the right medication so you wouldn't go into heat every month because it's more convenient for us both", he answered without having to think for a single second. "Today's the third of August, so you should be good for another ten days or so. But if not, please tell me. Your heat cycle has been messed up for almost three years once and we really can't allow for that to happen again."

Taking a deep, calming breath, Rin looked back at his Alpha and tried to collect the words that were stuck to his tounge.

"How... how open are we about... sex?", he finally managed to choke out faintly and Haru furrowed his brows, obviously confused.

"What do you mean?"

Was he really _trying_ to make this even _more_ embarrassing for Rin? The young Omega was blushing like there was no tomorrow now and felt his lips tremble before he could finally speak up again.

"How often?", he muttered, so quietly that Haru had probably trouble understanding him at all. "How often do we sleep with eachother?"

He expected a laugh, a suggesting smirk, a _"Thinking about that again already?",_ but Haru just answered calmly, like he'd answered every other question before.

"Usually three or four times a week. You can be quite a sex lunatic, especially when you're upset about something. Sometimes, you don't even let me sleep before you've gotten what you wanted. Also, you're irresistible when you're desperate."

Hearing someone he'd just met talk about him like this made Rin freeze on the spot and he pressed the back of his hand to his lips to calm down for a moment.

 _God, I really_ _**am**_ _a slut, after all..._

"Why are you even asking all of a sudden?", Haru interrupted his trail of thought and he spun around, cheeks still flushed dark red.

"I just, I... I thought, I..."

Burying his face in both hands, he stopped talking, too embarrassed to even start the sentence. After a few moments in silence, he felt a gentle touch to his shoulder and then, slender arms wrapped around him, letting him rest his head against Haru's warm chest.

"It's okay, you don't have to tell me", he whispered into the quiet air of the living room. "Just rest for a while now."

And like this, with his Alpha's comforting heartbeat against his skin, Rin fell asleep on the floor of the living room.


	3. Chapter 3

He was standing by a large glass window, glancing outside onto a brightly lit city at night. The room behind him was decorated with modern glass interior and a black couch, obviously this was a pretty expensive apartment. He looked around, trying to find something that would tell him where he was, but it just seemed like a regular city flat. As he turned back to the window, he suddenly heard shuffling behind him and flinched.

"H-Haru?", he called out shakily, not really wanting to take a look over his shoulder.

"Yes, dear?", his mate responded in a disgustingly sweet, soft voice and immediately, Rin knew that something was off.

Still-

"What... what are you doing?"

"Oh, don't worry, I'm sure you know what I am doing. You just can't remember", Haru answered, chuckling.

And suddenly, Rin was pushed forward, against the glass front of the apartment and even though he screamed and struggled, Haru wouldn't let go, pressing him up against the window even harder.

"You won't remember", was the last thing Rin heard being whispered right into his ear, and then his head got slammed against the glass, it shattered and he was falling, falling, falling...

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

"No!"

He awoke from the pain in his forehead and his own scream. There was darkness all around him, he couldn't see _anything_ and as he reached out one arm, he could only feel soft fabric around him. He didn't know where he was, he just blindly reached out for something to hold onto when his fingertips suddenly hit something hard, a loud crash followed and he couldn't help the hysterical screaming and sobbing that broke free from his throat until suddenly-

"Rin!"

The door was slammed open, a faint glimmer of light illuminated the dark room and then, there was a warm body right next to him, holding him down, dodging his hits and finally, Haru was able to grab his wrists, push them onto the mattress below until Rin had stopped trashing.

"Please, stop!", the young Alpha gasped with strained voice. "Rin, you're safe, it was a dream!"

Slowly, the haze of sleep left Rin's mind and when he looked up with heaving chest, tears streaming down his cheeks, Haru released his hands, leaned down and sighed in exasperation.

"God, you scared me! Are you alright?"

Worriedly checking Rin all over for injuries, he found a small, barely bleeding cut on the Omega's hand.

"What happened? I just heard something crash and came as fast as possible."

As he reached out one hand to switch on the lights, he noticed that the glass of water he'd put on the sidetable was laying on the floor, shattered to pieces. Letting out a soft breath, he sat back and looked down at Rin with a tired expression.

"Wait a second, I'll be right back", he muttered, slowly getting up from the bed, but his sleeve was grabbed so tightly that he almost stumbled.

"No, don't go, don't leave me alone, don't, don't, _don't..."_

Rin was openly crying now, the tears were pouring down his cheeks and he helplessly tried to wipe them away. Haru felt his own eyes starting to sting, knelt down by his mate, hugged Rin to his chest and began to whisper sweet nothings, told him that everything was okay, that it would be fine, that nothing could ever happen to him.

"Shhh, don't worry, you're safe", he whispered before gently tugging at the shirt Rin was wearing. It was drenched with sweat. "Come on, get out of that, you'll catch a cold. I'll get you some fresh clothes and a towel, I'm going to be back in less than a second."

Shaking, the young Omega struggled to get his shirt off, let it fall to the ground next to the bed and watched as Haru disappeared into a nearby room before returning with a wet towel and another glass of water. He opened the closet on the left side of the bed, dragged out some clothes and brought everything over to Rin. The redhaired man downed the cool liquid and closed his eyes, shivering shortly as Haru began to wipe the sweat off of his face and neck with the warm towel.

"You were dreaming pretty badly?", the Alpha asked quietly watching as Rin closed his eyes and nodded.

They stayed like this for quite some time, until Haru slowly backed away.

"I think, you should try and go to sleep again", he whispered, putting the towel down. "I'm just down the hallway if you need me. Call my name and I'll be there."

Rin swallowed, looked around the room again. He was resting on a king-sized bed, the sheets and pillows smelled so strongly like Haru, like the towel he'd found in the living room, that it was easy to figure out that this wasn't _his,_ this was _their_ bed.

"Where... where are you sleeping?", he asked unsurely, feeling bad about having made Haru spend the night somewhere else.

"In the guest room. I figured you would prefer it that way", the Alpha responded calmly. "But please don't worry, I don't mind."

_No, you don't mind. But I do._

"Can... can you stay here tonight? I don't... don't want to be alone."

It was the first time today that he saw Haru smile, a genuine, beautiful, loving smile.

"Of course. Just sleep, I will be here", the blackhaired man breathed, settling down on the bed next to Rin, stroking his hair until he noticed that the Omega had drifted off to sleep.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

Rin woke up with the worst headache, feeling exhausted and sick to his stomach. The pain was spreading throughout his body, so intense that he grew dizzy as he tried to sit up. Was he falling ill or was this just another consequence of his amnesia and the injury on his forehead? Thinking slowly turned into too much of an effort and eventually, the redhaired Omega rolled over, tugged the blanket over his head and tried to fall asleep again.

But suddenly, he felt his stomach churning and bolted out of bed into the bathroom, a sour taste on his tounge. Turning on the faucet, he swept some cold water into his mouth and clutched the edges of the sink, breathing heavily to fight the sickening urge to throw up, when he heard a ringing from downstairs, the sound of a door being slid open and then, two frantic voices.

"Kisumi just called me and told me about everything that happened yesterday, where is he?"

"Haru, I was so _worried_ all day yesterday but Mom said it would be better if I came by today so Onii-chan could at least rest overnight!"

Squeezing one eye shut while opening the other slightly, Rin looked up.

_Sosuke? Gou?_

"Hello, Gou. Yamazaki, he's sleeping and if you _dare_ to wake him up, you'll be very sorry. So calm down and go wait in the living room until he wakes up or I can kick you out right away if you'd prefer that", he heard Haru snarl.

Yes, it really _was_ Sosuke. And his little sister too! A smile slowly grazed Rin's lips. Judging from the light that was pouring in through the window, it was probably time to get up anyway. And so, he wandered back into the bedroom, slid on some jeans and a fresh shirt and padded down the stairs. Sosuke was just entering the house, putting away his and Gou's shoes and jackets, when he spotted Rin and his teal eyes filled with a mixture of fright, worry and relief.

"Rin! How are you feeling?", he asked reluctantly, like he didn't know how to act.

But when the redhaired man walked over to him, gently knocked their wrists together and grinned, all shadows vanished from his face, he hugged Rin close and let out a soft laugh.

"What the hell, man? I was so worried you may have forgotten me too!"

Chuckling, Rin looked up at his best friend and for the first time since yesterday, he felt completely at ease. He remembered so much about Sosuke that it didn't feel like he'd ever even had amnesia.

"Forgetting you idiot is impossible, even though I still wonder how someone can possibly forget themselves. Of course I still know you!", he smiled affectionately and let Sosuke ruffle his hair.

"That's good", the tall man sighed. "But seriously, how are you? That cut on your head looks bad."

Rin subconsciously lifted one hand to touch it and shrugged, cracking another smile.

"Oh well, it hurts, but Kisumi stitched it up yesterday and said it isn't too deep. Should heal in a few days."

While they were talking, another presence rushed up on them from behind and with a deafening squeal, Gou jumped into Rin's arms. Stumbling, the young Omega caught her and couldn't help the bright laugh bubbling from his throat.

"Gou! It's so nice to see you!"

"Onii-chan! When Kisumi-kun told me about what happened, I wanted to come here immediately, but Mom said you probably needed some rest! She's gotta work today, but she will stop by tomorrow afternoon!"

Smiling down at her with warm eyes, Rin examined her beautiful face closely.

_Yes, little sister, I remember you. I could never forget you._

Suddenly, Rin heard a voice coming from the doorway right behind him.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?"

Immediately, the redhaired Omega spun around and was met with a cautious look thrown at him from deep blue eyes. He felt himself blushing slightly.

"Y-Yeah, I actually did. Thanks for asking."

Haru nodded, walked past them and into the kitchen.

"You should all go have a seat in the living room. I'll bring you some tea and breakfast."

He sounded... frustrated. And Rin couldn't even blame him. How would _he_ feel if Haru had amnesia and remembered anyone but him?

_"...and as a consequence, the mind forces them to forget about the incident and everything related to it..."_

The voice echoing in his head made him scowl slightly and with that, something seemed to come rushing back to him. The wound on his forehead began to burn and sting, he fell forward and right into Sosuke's arms, trembling.

_I was so scared yesterday..._

"Onii-chan!"

"Rin? Hey, Rin, you okay? Haru!"

The voices were coming from afar, muffled by wave after wave of panic and fear.

"No, no, don't call Haru!", he barely managed to choke out, completely oblivious of where they were. "Don't call him, please, you've... you've got to _help_ me, Sosuke, please..."

The words were gushing from his lips before he could stop them. His arm were grabbed and he felt Sosuke shake him slightly.

"What are you saying? What's wrong? Rin, how am I supposed to help you?"

"What's going on? Yamazaki, I swear to God, what did you-"

Another voice began to mix into the chaos in Rin's head and he desperately clawed Sosuke's shirt when another hand was placed on his shoulder.

"N-No, stay away from me, don't touch me! Sosuke, _please!",_ he cried out in sheer panic and finally, _finally,_ his best friend seemed to understand.

His strong arms wrapped around the Omega protectively, hugging him close and shielding him from Haru's touch.

"Haru, I'm not sure what's going on, but you should probably stay back a bit", he warned, voice low and calm.

Rin was a sobbing, hysteric mess in his arms, not able to utter another word. Eventually, Sosuke carried him over into the living room, followed closely by Gou.

"Sosuke, what's wrong with Onii-chan? What just happened?", she cried out, tears streaming down her rosy cheeks and dripping onto her shaking hands.

Sosuke looked up at her, torn between telling her to shut up-

_Don't agitate him even more_

-and promising that everything was fine, that Rin was just not feeling very well. 

Instead, he sat down on the couch with Rin still in his arms and watched Haru cautiously who wasn't moving an inch from the doorway.

"Why is he suddenly afraid of you?"

But the blackhaired Alpha couldn't do anything but shake his head helplessly.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

Sleep didn't seem to help him rest at all lately. He woke up even more exhausted than before, feeling miserable and sick. Dark shadows were forming underneath his eyes, his skin had grown pale and Sosuke, who came by every day, had never seen his best friend in such a horrible state.

"Are you sure that you wanna stay here?", he asked one day as he and Rin were sitting in the living room, watching TV with the redhaired Omega resting against his chest. "Maybe... maybe it would do you good to stay with your mother or me for a while."

But as always and for some unknown reason, Rin shook his head determinately while struggling to keep his eyes open.

"No, I can't leave", he muttered. "I need to stay with Haru, I _have_ to stay with Haru."

His Alpha had disappeared to Makoto's house like he'd done so often over the last few days whenever Sosuke was around and the blackhaired man scoffed.

_What a nice mate you are, Nanase. Rin is sick and feels awful and you run off to your friend._

"Why?", Sosuke growled reluctantly. "You don't have to do _anything,_ nobody is forcing you to stay."

Rin just sighed and finally let his eyes close, too tired to keep them open any longer.

"Yes, I have to", he just muttered in a tone that didn't leave place for any kind of discussion. "I just... feel that I need to stay with him."

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

Makoto didn't know what to do with Haru pacing up and down in his living room everyday, running both hands through his black hair, a look of pure despair on his face and tears in his eyes.

"How am I supposed to tell him? How am I supposed to act around him? _How?"_

And Makoto couldn't give an answer. All he could do was sit and watch and try to calm Haru down.

"Maybe... if you just told him without dressing it up?", he finally suggested shyly, ducking his head, ready for a new rage fit.

The young Alpha stared at him with narrowed eyes, his pale lips parted and before Makoto could even think of apologizing, his best friend suddenly sank to the floor, burying his face in both hands and curling up into himself.

"How?", he whispered and suddenly, he looked so weak and fragile like back then when he'd heard Rin yell that he would quit swimming. "Makoto, he isn't ready for this, _I_ am not ready for this, I _know_ that but he won't believe me! He screamed at me, told me to fuck off, said that he'd manage to get by alone if I didn't want to stay with him!"

Slowly sinking to his knees, Makoto wrapped both arms around his friend, staring blankly ahead. This was just getting worse and worse. Haru leaned his head against the tall man's shoulder, sighing shakily like a child waking from a nightmare.

"And now, he's forgotten it all. He doesn't remember me, he doesn't remember anything. How am I going to tell him that he's pregnant and that we aren't ready for a child yet?"


	4. Chapter 4

It was already dark outside when Haru opened the front door, slid it shut behind him and looked around. The only light in the whole house was coming from the crack beneath the living room door. Sighing quietly, Haru went over to see if Rin was still up. Sosuke must've left a while ago. Peeking into the living room, Haru slowly stepped inside when he saw his boyfriend sleeping soundly on the couch. Just as he wanted to sit down next to Rin, he caught a glimpse of something on the coffee table. It was a note.

_Nanase,_  
_I hope you read this before Rin wakes up, but I assume he's too exhausted to even notice this here. I expect you to text or call me immediately after you've found the note._

_Sosuke_

Frowning, Haru reached out one hand to tuck a few strands of Rin's ruby red hair behind his ear before straightening his back and letting his gaze wander through the room. Where had he put his cellphone again? Finally, he spotted it on the windowsill and went over, picking it up. Sosuke's number had been saved to his contact list since the one incident where Rin had run off in the middle of Bankok, sending the whole Olympic team, Haru, Sosuke, Momo and Ai chasing after him with everyone on the phone in a massive group-call so they could inform eachother of where they currently were.

"Nanase."

Sosuke had picked up after the first ring and Haru almost jumped at the sudden voice right next to his ear.

"Yamazaki", he returned just as cold before moving out of the living room so he wouldn't disturb Rin in his sleep.

"Did you really return just _now?_ For God's sake, Rin is sick and he _needs_ you, why are you always running off to Tachibana's house?"

Haru felt like a scolded child, but that didn't keep him from snapping back at the other Alpha.

"Oh, now _I_ get the accusations for leaving? What am I supposed to do? Sit around with you two, watching as my own boyfriend is trembling in fear from just _looking_ at me?", he growled into the speaker, but Sosuke obviously wasn't in the mood for fighting. 

"Okay, okay, I understand. Still, let me know something", the darkhaired Alpha responded with a sigh. "What is wrong with Rin? He's throwing up, he's constantly either hot or cold, one minute he flinches away and the other he can't be close enough to me. Please, there's something going on and I'm worried, but he says he doesn't remember anything!"

Biting his lips, Haru sat down and shook his head slowly, pondering if he should tell Sosuke or not. He didn't like the other Alpha and speaking to him about Rin's condition seemed wrong, but on the other side...

 _What if something happens to Rin while I'm gone? Yamazaki_ _**needs**_ _to know._

"He... is pregnant", Haru finally whispered, closing his eyes and praying to every God that was currently listening that Sosuke would keep his mouth shut about it.

The line was quiet for a moment, then he heard a crash in the background. Glass shattering. A scream. He _felt_ the anger, the despair, the disbelief seeping through the phone.

"You fucking idiot!", Sosuke suddenly yelled. "You fucking, brainless, stupid idiot! What have you done to Rin? What have you _done?!_ I'll fucking _end_ you! I'm coming over _right now,_ don't you fucking _move_ until I'm there, don't you _touch_ him in any way, stay _away_ from him, stay-"

Before he could even finish his sentence, he'd already hung up and Haru could do nothing but slump down over the kitchen table, face buried in his hands.

"I didn't want this", he whispered to himself. "I never wanted this."

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

Sosuke barged into the house, not caring about how much noise he made.

"Rin!", he yelled out. "Rin, where are you? Are you okay? Rin!"

In less than a second, he was back in the living room, looking around frantically for any signs of his best friend until he noticed a weak movement on the couch.

"Sosuke?", a voice asked, heavy with sleep. "What... are you doing here again?"

Rushing over, Sosuke fell to his knees and hugged the Omega to his chest, his breaths were shaky and his chest heaved as he feverishly clawed Rin's hair.

"You're okay, did he hurt you? Oh my God, Rin, come on, let's go", he whispered, carefully helping his best friend to get up. "I'm taking you to my apartment, you're going to stay with me, I'm not leaving you here."

Just as he'd dragged Rin over to the front door, the young man suddenly snapped out of his trance and started to struggle slightly.

"H-Hey, what are you doing? What's wrong?", he gasped out irritatedly. "Did something happen?"

But Sosuke didn't listen - until someone suddenly stepped up in front of him.

"Stop", a quiet voice demanded. "Let go of him."

The tensed expression on Sosuke's face turned into pure rage as he bared his fangs and lowered his head.

"Get out of my way."

But Haru didn't move one bit, his blue eyes weren't even narrowed and he looked relatively calm.

"No. You don't understand."

Sosuke wanted to push him away, but the blackhaired Alpha wouldn't budge.

"I understand perfectly fine! Just you wait, I'll file a report tomorrow morning and then you can have a nice, long talk with the special unit officers", the taller man snarled, yet Haru didn't even react on that clear provocation.

"You don't understand", he repeated again, changing his focus from Sosuke to Rin, staring at his boyfriend with a soft expression for a moment.

Slowly, the redhaired man blinked. And blinked again. And took a step forward, away from Sosuke, towards Haru.

"What's going on?", he muttered, confused, his eyes nervously darting from left to right, from his best friend to his mate. "I don't even know what you're doing here, Sosuke, why should Haru hurt me? I..."

He groaned, bringing one hand up to rub his forehead when he felt Sosuke's arm wrapping around his shoulders.

"Come _on_ Rin, we're going now."

Trying to push the redhaired man towards the door, he furrowed his brows when Rin jerked away from him.

"Rin?"

But the redhaired Omega crossed both arms in front of his chest, shaking his head before taking a step back until he was standing right between Haru and Sosuke.

"I want to know what's going on", he stated firmly. "And I want answers. What are you so upset about? What is all this here?"

With a soft exhale, Haru leaned against the doorframe.

"We'll talk about it later. Yamazaki, come with me for a moment."

Throwing a hesitant look at the Omega, Sosuke followed the other man into the kitchen and shut the door behind him, understanding that Rin wasn't supposed to hear the conversation.

"What?", he hissed when they were finally alone. "What do you want? You want to tell me that it wasn't your fault?"

But Haru just calmly looked at him, not showing any kind of irritation.

"Yamazaki, you think I forced him, don't you? You think I forced him to sleep with me, impregnated him voluntarily and that's the reason he forgot me, don't you?"

The taller man was absolutely quiet, but that was worth more than any approval Haru could've asked for. He shook his head.

"I never forced Rin to do anything, I just... couldn't stop myself back then. A month and a half ago in Tokyo, I went into rut while he was out for a run and when he got back, I dragged him into the shower. There was no time for any kind of precautions, I was completely out of my mind and he was too. A week ago, he told me", the blackhaired Alpha muttered. "I was in utter shock, I never thought this one time would cause an immediate pregnancy. Just _trying_ to wrap my head around it was hard. It would interfere with our whole lifes. Rin wouldn't be able to compete anymore, I would have to quit too. We're too young for a kid. We're almost still kids ourselves! How are we supposed to care for a child?"

Sosuke listened intently, his scent slowly losing its bitterness and his whole body seemed to relax a little as Haru continued to talk.

"So, thinking rationally, I told him to consider an abortion. He started to yell at me, screamed, shoved me back when I tried to touch him, exclaimed that he would never do such a thing, that he would raise the child by himself if necessary. He really thought I would leave him because of this. So I tried to calm him down, tried to tell him that it had only been a suggestion, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually, he tripped as he stormed down the stairs and I rushed after him, but he escaped before I could even tell if the injury on his head was bad or not", the blackhaired Alpha finished his story. "Next thing I know is that I'm in on the phone with Kisumi who tells me that Rin is at the hospital, not remembering me and scared to death."

Hanging his head, Sosuke ran one hand through his hair with a somewhat guilty expression on his face.

"Okay, okay", he muttered. "I get it. Sorry, Nanase. I should've known better, but I was just... I thought... I apologize."

He bowed deeply, but the blackhaired Alpha just grabbed his upper arm and forced him to straighten up.

"Don't. I appreciate your worry. Rin is always safe around you and I'm very grateful to know that you care so deeply. Let's just forget about this whole incident and get him back to bed. He's probably very tired and confused. And - not a word about his condition to him."

Sosuke nodded determinately.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

"It hurts so fucking much!", Rin sobbed, tearing at the restraints that kept him down. "Haru, please, it hurts, it hurts..."

The young Alpha pressed up even closer to the glass window that separated them, taking breath after breath into his aching lungs. He couldn't breathe. Rin was in pain and he was calling for him and there was no way to get to him.

"I know", he whimpered desperately. "I know it hurts. Hold on, Rin, I'm _trying,_ okay?"

His fists slammed against the transparent wall again while he watched in horror as Rin began to cry.

"Haru, Haru, _please,_ make it stop, make it _stop,_ help me, Haru!"

His voice was so full of pain, of despair and fear that Haru couldn't take it. He began to throw his whole weight against the glass separating them, clawed the smooth surface, kicked it, frantically scanned the room he was in for something he could use.

There was nothing.

"Rin!", he yelled as loud as he could. "Rin, I'm here, I'm _here,_ everything's going to be okay, I promise, I promise, I promise..."

There was his Omega, crying, sobbing, screaming in pain and he could do _nothing_ to help him. Slowly, he slid to the floor, still pushed up tightly against the glass, as tight as possible, closing his eyes and gasping.

"Haru, Haru, _help me, please!"_

First, he noticed the glass getting warm against his skin, then, he dared to open his eyes again.

Blood.

So much blood.

Haru was paralyzed.

Rin was bleeding to death on the other side of this window and all he could do was sit and watch and go crazy.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

He was out of bed and stumbling down the hallway before he even had the chance to awake fully, to understand that it had been a nightmare. He needed to make sure Rin was okay, he needed to see him, touch him. The Omega was sleeping with a light frown on his face and when Haru rushed over, stroked his ruby red hair with shaky movements. Rin sighed before shifting slightly and blinking.

"Mmm... Haru?", he mumbled, rubbing his forehead. "What's going on?"

The young Alpha didn't respond, just stared and continued to gently comb his slender fingers through Rin's hair.

"You're okay", he finally whispered. "You're alright, aren't you?"

Scowling, his mate nodded, obviously hesitant.

"Of course. I mean, well..."

He broke off when Haru's grip suddenly tightened, almost making him hiss from the pain.

"What? What's wrong?", the blackhaired man asked, alarmed.

Rin wrapped both arms around himself reflexively, shielding most of his body from his mate.

"I _do_ have a stomachache, but it's not-"

He couldn't even finish. Haru was on his feet in less than a second, storming out of the room and down to the kitchen where he'd left his phone.

Just fifteen minutes later, the front door opened and at the same moment, Haru looked up the stairs as Rin padded down, tired and worn-out with dark circles beneath his eyes.

"Haru, I don't understand what's wrong all of a sudden..."

The least he expected was to be grabbed from behind and he cried out in shock, instinctively reaching out for his mate, but Haru just watched, trembling but otherwise calm.

"It's to your best, Rin", a soft voice muttered next to him and then, something sharp got pushed into his arm. "You'll sleep now and when you wake up, everything's going to be fine."

"Kisumi...", the redhaired Omega whimpered, trying to keep his eyes open.

He felt so weak all of a sudden, so exhausted... Pleadingly staring up at Haru, he tried to get an answer, but the Alpha only shook his head.

"I'm sorry", Rin saw him mouth silently before a pleasant darkness consumed his consciousness.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

"Are you sure about this?", Kisumi asked quietly as Rin collapsed forward and into Haru's arms. "I mean, it's your legal right as an Alpha to decide over your mate and your children, but it's... it's just not _like_ you to ignore Rin's wishes like this..."

But the second he locked eyes with the blackhaired man, he knew that trying to talk Haru out of this was senseless. There was this look of pure determination on the Alpha's face, the look Kisumi often saw on Haru right before a race.

"I'm not letting him get hurt by this baby", Haru whispered, looking down at his mate with a bitter expression. "I'm not _losing_ him to this baby."

Kisumi hung his head and followed closely as Haru carried the redhaired man outside and down the stairs, past the torii-shrines and onto the main road where the young doctor had parked his car. Climbing into the driver's seat, Kisumi looked back at Rin and Haru, the Alpha gently adjusting his mate's position so that he would be comfortable during the ride. With one last exasperated sigh, the pinkhaired man started the engine and drove off.

As they made their way through the nocturnal city, his gaze was dragged towards the rearview mirror, just to see how Rin was doing. He had slipped under the anesthesia pretty quickly in his exhausted state, a little _too_ quickly for Kisumi's liking. Maybe Haru was right after all?

"Umm... hey...", he muttered, trying to be as cautious as possible - the Alpha seemed to be pretty sensitive on this topic. "What about we check on Rin and the baby first before deciding on what to do? I mean... beside some pretty common stomachaches, he hasn't complained about anything lately, has he?"

A low growl answered him.

"Kisumi."

It was a threat, as quiet as the falling of snowflakes on a winter morning that would soon turn into a blizzard, leaving Kisumi shivering.

"Okay, okay, I get it."

His knuckles were white on the steering wheel as they finally pulled into the first aid parking lot. Pushing a small button on his pager, Kisumi got out of the car and watched as a few doctors came outside to help them, but he had made the calculation without Haru. The blackhaired Alpha was hissing agitatedly at everyone who came too close as he gently carried Rin out of the car and towards the hospital.

"Sir, please, Sir, you can't just-"

The young man who had been so stupid to approach Haru backed away with wide eyes and a bleeding cut on his hand while the Alpha stood there, eyes narrowed down to thin slits and fangs bared, growling.

"Don't touch him. Don't touch _me._ Stay away."

His voice was deep and rough, possessive, angry. Until Kisumi hurried after him, carefully touched his elbow and guided him inside.

"It's fine, Haru. Nobody is going to do anything. Let's just get Rin to the examination room and then we'll check on him", he purred softly to calm the Alpha down.

And really, Haru followed him, mistrust still clear in his eyes but not as prominent as before. When they finally reached one of the spare rooms, Kisumi closed the door with a relieved exhale and turned around to see Haru sitting down by the bed, upper half of his body curling into Rin's side, breathing heavily.

"It's going to be alright, I promise", he whispered desperately, clutched the hem of the Omega's shirt. "I'll be here when you wake up and you're going to be okay, we're going to be okay..."

Kisumi bit his lips, feeling his stomach churn slightly at the sight. Still, he tried not to let his emotions show as he switched on the ultrasound unit and sat down in his chair.

"I'll just do a quick once-over to make sure he is fine and in the condition to undergo surgery", the young doctor explained, gently pushing Rin's shirt up and grabbing a tube of gel from the table.

Haru just nodded, his ocean blue eyes glued to Rin's face as he gently brushed a few strands of ruby red hair out of the way.

"I don't want you to be gone", he suddenly whispered and Kisumi had to swallow around the lump in his throat.

If someone didn't believe in true love, they should probably hear Haru talking and see how he looked at Rin in this exact moment.

This couldn't be called anything _but_ true love.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

"Okay, I'm done with the examinations", Kisumi announced after a short time and glanced down at his clipboard. "Seems like there are no problems with Rin or the baby at all. Now, his current exhaustion is a minor issue and could lead to tachycardia during the operation, but as it will take only fifteen minutes at most, that shouldn't trouble us too much."

Haru stared at him blankly, slender fingers wrapped tightly around Rin's hand. The young Omega was still unconscious, his face was pale and he looked so fragile in the midst of those white sheets that Kisumi felt like throwing up.

 _"Even if your patients are family or friends, nothing may ever tarnish your ability to do your job",_ he heard his father's voice suddenly ring through his head and steeled himself, taking a deep breath.

"We'll put him under medications now so he won't wake up or feel anything, then he's ready for the surgery. I'd like you to wait here, in about half an hour, we'll be done", he muttered, pushing a thin needle into Rin's arm. "Do you need anything, Haru?"

The Alpha didn't answer immediately, just watched as the clear liquid from the IV started to seep into Rin's body.

"No."

His voice was dry and raspy, his eyes bloodshot and his hair tousled. He looked like he'd been up for nights on end and Kisumi placed one hand on his shoulder.

"Are you sure? You look horrible", the young doctor tried again. "I can get you some medicine to calm down if you feel like-"

"I said, _no."_

Haru still didn't lift his gaze. He was sweating, his shirt was soaked and his skin shone in the much too bright hospital light. Raising both hands in defeat, Kisumi put the clipboard away.

"Got it. Just tell me... Rin is okay, the baby is okay, too, so why?", he asked softly. "It's not like there would be any problems."

At first, it didn't seem like the Alpha would answer, but then...

"I don't want him to die."

Haru buried his face in Rin's shirt, his whole body was shaken by violent contractions like he was crying.

"But Haru, I just told you, they would both be fine if you-"

"No."

Kisumi felt that this wasn't going anywhere. Sitting down next to Haru, he gently rubbed the Alpha's shoulder.

"Tell me, why do you want this abortion so badly?", he asked, trying to give his voice a soothing tone. "I do understand that you don't feel ready for a child yet, but there are several very good agencies who we regularly get in touch with. They take care of babies if parents are not willing or able to raise them, and I think that would be a good alternative."

Haru shook his head.

"Think about Rin for a second. He doesn't even remember that he's pregnant. He doesn't even know that you want an abortion. How are you going to explain it to him once he finds out?"

Again, Haru shook his head.

"I don't want him to die."

Clawing his bubblegum pink hair with one hand, Kisumi bit his lips in exasperation. And while his mind was racing, he finally came to a conclusion.

"Okay, I'll do it", he sighed. "But first, promise me that you'll have some tea and take a light sedative, otherwise you might fall unconscious due to stress and I don't think your body can handle any more of it."

For a moment, it didn't look like the young man had even listened, but then, he closed his eyes and nodded in agreement. Relieved, Kisumi got back up, checked on the IV again and left to inform one of his colleagues about Haru's condition. Luckily, the nurse's room wasn't far and two young Betas immediately agreed to take care of everything for Kisumi.

"Just leave him to us and focus on the surgery, we'll do our best", one of them reassured and gently pulled his coworker along.

 _Me too,_ Kisumi thought dejectedly.

He knew exactly that Rin would never agree to something like this, but on the other hand - Haru was the Alpha and he had the right to decide.

"I hope I'm not messing your relationship up too badly", he muttered to himself as he tied his hair back into a ponytail and stepped towards the surgery room. "And I hope you know what you're doing, Haru."

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

His white gloves were covered in blood as Kisumi stepped back a bit, letting more light flood the table.

"This... this is impossible", he muttered against his face mask. "How could..."

One of his assistants looked up, her eyes were wide with confusion and disbelief.

"You said his mate wanted the abortion?", she asked, obviously hesitant. "There is _no way_ he could've known!"

Kisumi was tempted to rush out of the room, find Haru and ask him what the fuck had lead him to the conclusion that this pregnancy was going to end in a disaster.

"This didn't even show on the ultrasound", he noted, glaring down at his bloodied hands. "It would have _never_ shown on the ultrasound. We would have overlooked it."

He began working on the open cut with calm motions, eyes narrowed and dark.

_Rin would've died giving birth to this baby._


	5. Chapter 5

_Where am I?_

White. White walls, white ceiling, white windowframe, white curtains.

_Home?_

No. This wasn't home. At least not Haru's house in Iwatobi. Tokyo? Haru had mentioned their flat in Tokyo. No, didn't look like it. Carefully propping himself up onto his elbows, he stared towards the window. A slightly cloudy sky was to be seen.

"Have I been sleeping?", he muttered to nobody in particular before finally dropping his gaze to the IV tube that was connected to his arm. "The hospital?"

The light sound of someone breathing suddenly came through to his still dazed mind and when he turned his head to the side, he saw a person sleeping in the second bed close to him. Black hair was spilled over the light blue pillow, one arm was reached out towards him like they'd been holding hands until he'd rolled over.

"Haru", Rin whispered, gently moving to sit by the edge of his bed, but then he suddenly recalled what had happened before.

_A pain in his arm, the weight of his own exhaustion growing too heavy to bear any longer, the dull despair in his mind as he hears Haru's word ringing through his head._

_"I'm sorry."_

He jerked back like the proximity of his Alpha alone had burnt him. What had Haru done? What had happened? He remembered Kisumi being there, he remembered being carried out of the house and into a car.

"Good morning, Rin", a voice suddenly spoke very softly and a tall figure emerged from the small hallway that led to the door. "I'm happy to see you're already awake. Now, do you feel any pain?"

Before the redhaired Omega could answer, Kisumi was already by his side, gently tugging the bedsheets back and revealing clean white bandages wrapped around his middle.

"W-What?!", Rin stuttered. "What happened? What did you do?"

Checking on the small monitor beside the bed, Kisumi smiled down at him before carefully running his hands over Rin's abdomen, putting light pressure on certain spots, causing the Omega to flinch and mewl in pain.

"It's perfectly normal for the scar to hurt right now. You should be careful for a few days, then it's going to be alright. Is there anything else bothering you?", the doctor mused when all of a sudden, bedsheets rustled behind him.

"What are you doing to him?", Haru growled sleepily. "Leave him alone, he's in pain, leave him _alone-"_

Almost slipping off the bed, the Alpha dragged Kisumi back with dark shadows looming over his face. Rin threw him a harsh glare, then turned back to look at the doctor again.

"Why am I here?", he demanded. "Can someone just _fucking tell me something for once?"_

But Kisumi's eyes wandered over to Haru, then he shrugged and smiled apologetically.

"All I did was comply with Haru's wishes. It's better if you two talk this through alone or with one of our therapists."

"I want to know _what happened!",_ Rin hissed angrily.

This had been going on for a week now, this constant talk between his friends and family, this _Never-include-Rin-in-one-of-your-conversations-even-though-he's-standing-right-next-to-you_ and it made him _sick._

"Would someone _please_ just finally tell me what's even going on anymore? Why are we both at the hospital? Why am I wrapped in bandages like somebody hit me with a fucking car? Why have I been feeling like shit over the past couple days? Why is everyone telling me that _we'll talk later?_ Just fucking tell me _now!"_

For a moment, Haru and Kisumi stared at him like he'd gone crazy, but Rin was unwilling to accept the fact that everone was just talking _about_ him and not _with_ him. He was done with this shit. He was done with everything. Worse enough that he didn't remember anything about himself, about his life, about Haru - obviously, everyone wanted to make him paranoid by talking about something only they knew about!

"Rin, you should probably calm down, it's not good for you to overreact like that!", Kisumi groaned and the redhaired Omega felt his anger boiling up again.

"Oh, it's not good for me to _overreact?_ Then it's probably not good for Sosuke and Haru to overreact too! Because they have been doing exactly that for the last few days! I've been woken up countless times because one of them is either screaming at me or screaming at the other and all I want is to finally know _why,_ I just-"

He was completely out of breath when Haru suddenly got up and threw a look at Kisumi.

"Leave", he muttered quietly and the young doctor backed away hesitantly.

"Okay. I'll come back later and if you need something, call me or one of the nurses."

Closing the door behind himself, he left the room in silence with only Rin's heavy breathing echoing from the white walls. Haru brought one hand up to run it through his hair, then he sat back down and closed his eyes with a sigh.

"Fine. Will you listen for a moment?"

Rin eyed him suspiciously, then he nodded, partly afraid of why Haru was acting like this out of the blue.

"Did we... get into a car crash?", he suddenly blurted out when he remembered that the last thing he knew was being carried into a car. "Is that it?"

His Alpha stared up at him, then he shook his head and buried his face in both hands.

"You're making this way more complicated than it needs to be."

Rin clawed his hair, confused and desperate for any kind of explanation, _anything_ that would help him understand at all.

"Haru, I _beg_ of you! Why are you doing this? I thought..."

His own words hit him like a heart attack.

Every muscle in his body seemed to convulse.

And in this second, Rin remembered who he was and what he had wanted to forget.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

The return of all his memories was like re-watching a movie he knew by heart. Pictures, clear as day, shining and colourful were displayed on an empty white canvas. Oh yes, now he remembered.

It was early morning and Haru had just finished his bath, rubbing his beautiful jet black hair dry with a towel as he stepped back into the bedroom. Rin almost didn't dare to approach him, his hands were trembling as he stared down at them.

_How am I going to tell him? Straight away? What if he doesn't want it? What do I do if he leaves me?_

"Hey, Haru...", he began hesitantly.

The blackhaired Alpha turned around and glanced at him with a questioning expression before dropping the towel onto his shoulders to soak up the remaining dampness from his hair.

"Yeah?"

Rin took a deep breath, slumped down on their bed and looked up at his mate, desperately searching for the right words.

"I... I'm not so sure how to put this..."

His voice must've given him away, because Haru's eyes narrowed down to thin slits.

"You're making me nervous, Rin. What's wrong?"

He'd had curved one eyebrow, giving his usually so stern face a softer tone as he sat down next to the young Omega. Rin wasn't the one to beat around the bush and seeing him this shaky and unsettled made Haru's worry spike up.

"Just tell me", he finally suggested when the redhaired man wouldn't do anything but bite his lips and stare down. "You know that I'll listen, no matter what." 

He almost felt nauseous. Rin had been acting strange for a few days already, but Haru hadn't wanted to ask since after all, they were on vacation back in Iwatobi and it was probably just the drastic change in their schedules that had caused his Omega's uneasiness. Now...

"Haru, you have no idea", Rin muttered before closing his eyes, breathing deeply and sitting back against the headboard. "But alright, I'll tell you. Remember your rut one month ago? We were in our flat in Tokyo that week."

Frowning, the blackhaired Alpha nodded. He remembered it well, it had been the most intense rut he'd had in a while and they hadn't slept for quite some time that four days.

"So... you also remember that you dragged me into the shower on your fist day, don't you?"

"Rin, I don't know where you're headed. Just tell me already."

The Omega stared him in the eyes for ten solid seconds, then parted his lips.

"You're going to be a father."

Silence. A disbelieving glare. And then the realisation that crept onto Haru's face as he understood that Rin was being serious. His eyes closed and he straightened his back.

"Are you joking right now?"

He sounded completely indifferent yet Rin could read from his expression that he _wanted_ it to be a joke, a harmless prank, something they could laugh off in a few seconds. Gritting his teeth, the young Omega turned to the side.

"Do you really think I would joke about something like this?"

He didn't even recognize his own voice anymore. Haru took a deep breath and glanced up at the ceiling, then back at Rin.

"An abortion, then."

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

It felt like tiny daggers were piercing every single nerve in his body. Jolting, he backed away and all air was pressed from his lungs, the only thing preventing him from doubling over was Haru's iron grip on his wrist that left dark bruises.

_I must've misunderstood him. There is no way Haru just said that._

"What... _what?!"_

But Haru just glared back at him, paler than ever.

"You heard me."

And in the same moment, something inside of Rin broke. Haru's scent became overwhelming, his presence in the room seemed to crush everything. Gasping for air, Rin struggled to shake the feeling off, the feeling of Haru's embraces, his kisses, his lips on his neck, hands on his sides and everything just seemed to choke him.

"No! _Never!",_ he yelled, jumping up from the bed and nearly knocking over the nightstand. "What are you saying? Haru! I won't, I won't even _think_ about it! What the _hell_ has gotten into you? Have you gone crazy?"

The blackhaired man tried to get ahold of him, but Rin spun around, breathing heavily. This couldn't be happening. He needed to get out. He needed to get away. Haru had gone crazy. He couldn't _believe_ what he'd just heard. The worst scenario Rin could've asked for had just played out right in front of him.

"Rin! Rin, wait, where are you going? _Rin!"_

The Alpha was coming after him, but Rin just shoved him away and clawed the wall for support, gasping.

"Stay away from me or I'll fucking kill you!", he hissed, blinded by anger, baring his fangs. "I'll end you!"

Haru had never looked so distraught like in this moment as long as Rin had known him.

"Please, calm down! Do you hear yourself talking? I just said-"

"I will not let you harm this child, I swear to God! And if you don't want to be there to raise it, I'll do it on my own, I'll tell you that!"

Haru was speechless, but before he could grab Rin's hand, keep him in place, the redhaired man already bolted down the stairs.

_Sosuke. I need to get to Sosuke. He'll protect me, I know it. He'll protect the baby._

His foot hit thin air and suddenly, everything went black, then red and finally, he was standing upright again.

"Oh God, Rin, please! Rin, stop, you're hurt, let me- _Rin!"_

Haru's voice faded into the distance as he rushed out of the house and down the stone stairs, his head was throbbing, something continued to trickle down his forehead, blurring his sight.

"Why?", he sobbed desperately, feeling the adrenaline pulsing in his blood. "Why are you doing this, Haru, I thought you would... I thought... I thought..."

He was suffocating on his own words, wiping his face with the back of his hand as he ran, away from the house and away from Haru.

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

He was throwing up before he even knew, hands clawing the bandages on his abdomen, ripping them apart and away as he stared down, shaking. The image of a bright red scar seared into his mind, burnt his whole being and made him feel so numb as if he'd been drenched with ice water.

"Haru!", he whimpered, eyes wide in horror and for the first time in almost over a week, this name meant something to him again. "Haru, what have you _done?"_

The Alpha didn't move, just stared, equally shocked, equally unable to move.

"I didn't..."

He couldn't finish thinking the sentence through when Rin already got up, sharp teeth bared in something that was despair and rage and such a deep, sincere hatred that Haru didn't dare to breathe.

"You better be going now or I'll tear you to shreds and feed your pathetic soul to every devil that may come by", the young man whispered with trembling voice and it was worse than if he'd just screamed at the Alpha.

Crimson red eyes followed Haru's every move intently as he slowly got to his feet, turned around and walked over to the door where he threw one last glance at Rin like he was hoping the Omega would call him back, but no such luck - his gaze was met with a low growl and a clenched jaw.

"Out."

Quietly, the door fell shut and Rin's legs gave out. He sank to the floor right where he'd been standing, wrapped both arms around himself, not able to cry, not able to get up either. All he could do was think _Haru killed my baby._

※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※ ◎ ※

Rin didn't talk.

He didn't talk to Kisumi.

He didn't talk to Sosuke.

He didn't eat.

He didn't sleep.

Just stared at the wall for hours.

Everytime Haru visited, he curled up on his bed and didn't react to anything the Alpha said until Kisumi refused to let Haru into Rin's room anymore.

"It's not good for him! You _can't_ expect him to treat you like before, he is suffering from the emotional aftermath of an abortion _you_ forced onto him!", he declared one day with his purple eyes flashing furiously. "No, Haru, I will _not_ let you see him until he's better!"

The only people he allowed to visit were Sosuke, Gou and Rin's mother yet he cautiously monitored the young Omega's behaviour, ready to kick everyone out should he feel overwhelmed. Kisumi made sure he got some rest, ate at least a few bites of his food everyday, still...

Rin didn't seem to get better.

The therapist who came by at least once a day was always answered with silence. Nobody was able to get through to the redhaired man until the day he was ready to be dismissed. Kisumi had tried offering him a taxi and a hotel room, Rin had just muttered something about Sosuke picking him up. But shortly after the blackhaired Alpha had arrived, someone else showed up in the doorway that lead to Rin's room.

Startled by the quick, light footsteps, Sosuke turned around, his teal eyes narrowing when he caught the scent.

"Come here", he muttered to Rin who was standing in the middle of the room, frozen, unable to move or do anything but stare, and swiftly stepped up behind him like he wanted to shield the redhaired Omega from the other person's presence.

Haru's arrival was like a sudden shadow on a sunny day and Rin took a step back until he felt Sosuke's reassuring warmth against his shoulders. There was silence for a long time. Then, Rin's chapped, dry lips parted as he spoke for the first time in days.

"What do you want?", he asked dryly, feeling Sosuke take a step forward behind him, ready to attack if needed.

But Haru just averted his gaze, signaling the taller Alpha that he had not come to fight. Another agonizing silence.

"I want my mate back", a quiet voice finally muttered.

Rin swallowed. And swallowed again, trying to process Haru's words. This couldn't be. How could he ask such a thing after what he had done?

_I want my mate back._

"I love you, Rin. I know you don't believe me, that you think I'm a monster", Haru continued, "but I want you to know that I love you. I just want this whole nightmare to be over, I want you to come home. I want you back. And I'm sorry for causing you all this pain."

The young Omega was shaking and Sosuke's grip on his shoulder tightened.

"Nanase, I think it's better if you leave now", he growled, tried to gently push Rin forward and past the blackhaired man, but Haru shook his head determinately. 

"Rin, listen", he almost _begged._ "Please, listen! I'm so sorry about putting you through all this, I really am. But I _had_ to!"

Rin slowly let his bag sink to the ground, sensing Sosuke move too, but before the darkhaired Alpha could pull him back, he'd already slapped his best friend's hand away and taken a step forward.

"You _had_ to?", he hissed dangerously low. "Oh, I see, you _had_ to. Because a child would've ruined my career. _Your_ career. Isn't that right? You chose swimming over me, you chose swimming over your own _child._ You killed your own child just so you could keep swimming! And you know what? I never want to see you again, not ever again!"

The rage that overcame him in that moment was just too much to take. All of the frustration, the anger, hate and despair he'd ever felt in his entire life, his disgust for this man who purposely ruined his and everyone else's life just so he could get into a stupid pool on a daily basis made him burst and he screamed it into Haru's face, screamed the _truth_ into Haru's face so he would finally understand that he had destroyed everything until he was completely out of breath, shivering and crying. His Alpha stared back at him, broken and helpless, hands curled into fists. They stared at eachother for quite some time until Haru turned around.

He just turned around and stood there, completely motionless in the midst of a white room with white curtains and white walls and a white ceiling yet his hands were tainted red with the blood of his child, their child, _Rin's_ child.

Then, finally, his lips moved and Rin scowled.

"What?"

The young Alpha closed his eyes, then he repeated what he had just said.

"It would've killed you."

All of the tension in Rin's body seemed to evaporate as he flinched back, his eyes trained on the man before him.

"It would have killed you", Haru muttered again. "During the operation, Kisumi found out that giving birth to that child would've killed you."

Tears were dripping down the redhaired man's face as he brought one hand up to his mouth. He felt nauseous.

"I would've died for our baby", he whispered against his palm. "Gladly."

Suddenly, Haru spun around and grabbed him, pulling him against his body, holding him as tight as possible and Rin let it happen. He didn't even try to get away. He didn't want to. He wanted to stay here forever, to be held by Haru for the rest of eternity, to just go back to how things were before that one unlucky day.

"How can you say that when I need you?", the Alpha breathed against his skin. "How can you say you're willing to leave me like this? I need you, I want you, I can't live without you, Rin. Don't leave me. I can't ever lose you. I can have a dozen children, but if I lose you, I can't ever get you back."

Haru's voice slowly faded out and his grip on Rin became bruising, but the Omega couldn't feel the pain anymore. He just wrapped his arms around his mate's neck and closed his eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this will be the last chapter of this part! ( ﾉ^ω^)ﾉﾟ I hope you all enjoyed the drama and are looking forward to the next part of "Sky's the limit"~ ɾ⚈▿⚈ɹ Thanks for reading, leaving kudos and reviewing so nicely.
> 
> xoxo  
> (◕‿◕✿)


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